“This is the end, hold your breath and count to ten… feel the earth move and then, hear my heart burst again.” - Skyfall by Adele

Akahana Eriko had a nightmare that night and so she was up sooner than usual. For a person like her nightmares were not a rare occurrence. Sometimes she envied other persons who could sleep at night and feel refreshed the next day. Not that she slept much but, when these things happened the only thing she could do was go outside in the wilderness and practice her fighting skills with her two katanas. This probably did not make sense to a lot of people but it was her way to let it all out and feel better. While some would find comfort on a warm drink or merry conversation, she had been trained to become a killing machine for many years so what most people would consider the best means to release stress, grief and fear-such as crying, depending on others, or the like-did not exist in her world. It was way past midnight but it was not dawn yet and the air was cold and damp but that did not irk the Miko as she kept on moving with a rhythm of her own, it was almost as if she had suddenly began a war dance and her legs moved in harmony with nature but at the same time with a speed unlike most women would perform, even among those trained to fight. Her arms moved around her to protect her from potential attackers she envisioned for the sole purpose of this practice dance and to relieve her mind from the pain of the nightmare that still plagued in her mind. Ever since she had been told she was the Miko and basically had been begged to save Kutou, well, she had grown more and more worried. Many would think it strange that a Priestess would not be looking forward to finding all her Seishi and returning to her world, but she really did not want to go back.

While some Miko had families, lovers or friends waiting for them back in their home world, Akahana had nothing of the sort since her childhood. True, Gina was her friend but her way of life meant she could not spend much time with her anymore and the path she followed had no future in it for her. She could still remember the loneliness she had experienced back in Tokyo, she nearly forgot to breathe as she turned behind herself to parry imaginary swords. Sometimes she would tell Gina that, she did not feel like the living. How could she? Being a weapon to kill, rob, sabotage and destroy was no life and many times she had been close to the edge, ready to let go and escape this world. But Gina always stopped her, she was such a foolish optimist. She constantly ranted about the possibility of Akahana’s life to improve at some point. She smirked for a moment, if she saw her now she would have such a smug look about her. It was true. Her life had surprisingly improved upon her arrival to this book.

Albeit, some mistook her weariness with a lack of interest in helping this kingdom. It was that way of life that she dreaded the most and if she had been spared from Zuku’s asphyxiating grip back then-when she entered the book-she had no desire to go back to such inhuman slavery. In any case, she would not go unpunished for being brought to this world instead of fulfilling her task and she did not want to know what he could be planning for the moment she returned. She shivered coldly despite the adrenaline rush and the heat irradiating form her tanned skin as she spun elegantly swinging both blades. She closed her eyes for a brief moment before she jumped backward trying to regain calm and her usual stoic personality while she parried an attack that would never come. She took a deep breath and groaned in exasperation as she remembered the last time she had been punished for disobeying Zuku. Before she got lost in the book she was reading she had been given a task at hand and she never fulfilled it. She could not help it but to read the book though, she was tired, she was a tormented soul and she needed to escape this darkness. And yet now she was thrown into more darkness and it was probably one she could not evade that easily. She wondered though if at some point what she dreamt would come to pass and she would see Zuku enter this world and gain enough power to destroy her. He was such a wicked man he would probably try and destroy all the persons near her just to teach her about disobeying his orders. That shocked her slightly, as she had not stoped to think about what that would mean for the people who had welcomed her into their homes.

Due to such thoughts, she lost concentration and slipped on a rock, she quickly placed her other leg back for support before she fell and she took deep breaths as she paused the war dance for a moment. The music of nature still filled her heart. She shivered as she took deep breaths thinking of how horrible it would be if he actually did come to Kutou, and though her Seishi had promised to protect her, well, part of her knew how dangerous that man truly was. Would any of her Seishi manage to outsmart such a villain? After all, he was the one responsible for making Akahana the ‘person’ she now was. Although, she thought there was noting human about her by now, no emotions, she felt nothing but fear, grief and the cold, the cold of the many crimes she committed on innocent people because she was forced to in more ways than one. And those persons accompanied her wherever she went. The guilt of doing things like those at times ate at her. But she did not wish to forget, for these crimes were her own doing. She panted for a moment as if feeling the anxiety of her past. And though she felt grief and despair, she could not cry. She did not know how to do anything but kill. Zuku even limited her conversations so that she turned into a silent person and unable to express her feelings or even recognise them. At times it was almost as if she had been deprived from her soul. As if he were a demon and stole it when she was an innocent child.

She sighed and then once more held her blades and started a more defiant war dance and she promised herself that she would do everything at hand to escape this fate, escape Zuku or kill him. But how could she make such an oath? Many had tried this and failed miserably. She lost concentration once more and her foot hit a great tree root and to prevent any injuries she moved backward and her back hit the tree trunk harshly and she gasped not expecting that. Her back tensed with the impact But she soon reinitiated the practice and tried to apply more speed, precision and concentration. To stop thinking about all these problems of hers that she had never told anyone about. Even her Seishi, no, she did not like talking about herself. Besides, she was a very proud person and admitting that there was someone in her life she feared greatly and did not wish to ever see again was beyond her capabilities. Besides she knew people, and she did not want that to be rubbed on her face at some point, it would be too painful for her to bear. People used your weaknesses on you, and Akahana was not about to let her arrogant self show any sign of weaknesses. She practiced as hard as she could but, her concentration failed her several times.

Nevertheless, she was so desperate to get rid of these thoughts and relax once more that she did not see a big hole when she stepped back to leap forth in an attack and she lost balance. She had to drop one of her twin blades to avoid falling in. When doing so, she received a cut on her left solder from one of her own blades. Usually she did not have accidents like these and she lowered her head before taking hold of her blades once more. She shook her head feeling her long red hair shake violently with a whiff of air almost making echoes of her need to break free. If only she could just stay in this world with the certainty that she would never see her old master again. But, who could ever guarantee that? Surely if he learned where she was he would do everything at hand to come and make her pay for leaving. Even though she did not decide to leave and enter that book in the first place. But he would not listen, she knew that. Or perhaps someone heard her, someone took pity on her angst and granted her one chance to make things right and live among the living and not the dead. She could feel the burning pain on her shoulder but she ignored it and kept on practicing. Each strike was more ferocious than the previous one and her body moved in tune with nature. Her hair swinging elegantly with every movement, jump and attack. And yet nothing showed the fury of the moment better than her scarlet eyes that burned life fire whenever she made the correct move and did not get distracted by her thoughts.

She was not sure how long she had been practicing for. But there came a moment when her body demanded her to stop and she could no longer concentrate on the movements. After trying to keep on fighting her inner demons and dancing with the blades in her hands, she dropped to her knees, the pain in her shoulder still there and blood still flowed through the cut. She tried to stand up but she could no longer do that. She leaned forth slightly, drenched in exhaustion. She even lowered her guard and was unaware if anyone was nearby or not. In fact, even if someone approached her she would not sense it, since she was completely absorbed by her thoughts.[/blockqiote]

“The wise ones would have you believe that dreams hold no power, once you wake.” This is a soft, gentle voice, and known to the young Miko, though she is perhaps more accustomed to hearing the battle-roughened, harsher tones of it. And indeed, there is an edge of familiar strength and resolve to it now, sounding quietly from a few feet away from her, but it is somehow both lighter and heavier than is usual. “They would tell you that a dream cannot hurt you… but they sleep sound in their elegant rooms in a polished palace, surrounded by guards, where they have no comprehension of real danger or fear. We, who are real, know what nonsense they speak.”

He knew… at least, he understood a little. He’d stirred as she left her place by the fire, but hadn’t immediately followed, knowing that few things that woke one in the dead of night were pleasant, and generally none of those were things that one wanted to share with another, even between the closest of friends. And despite Shun’s insistence in reassigning him to serve as Akahana’s personal guard, and the time they had spent together as a result of that decision, he could not yet claim to be a friend of the Miko. No, in fact he did not personally know of any person who could make that claim: she was often distant and unapproachable, and that did not lend well to forming fast friendships with others. Having grown up at the palace, and raised among a group of close knit friends, he had no experience with the kind of loneliness that he perceived in her, but imagined it had to be very isolating.

A hand shifted slowly into the front of his shirt - like many raised to a warrior’s life, he tended to sleep fully dressed, on the road - and drew out a square of cloth, clasping it gently in his fingers as he continued. “It is no business of mine what you do with your personal time, Miko-san… but your physical security is my utmost concern.” This was both a serious statement, and also a second sounding of his voice, to allow her mind to come to the realization that the person who was near to her, so suddenly, was known to her, and not a threat, and he paused a moment more before beginning to cross to her. His feet were light and soft, even in the woodland brush, revealing how he was able to get so close to her, with her distraction, but his sword remained slung at his waist, his free hand empty as he approached to offer the handkerchief. “You’re going to have difficulty, binding that up on your own.”

If she returned to her world it would all be over, of that she was sure. Zuku would see to that, she finally gave up on standing up and remained kneeling and her right hand dropped her sword and it fell on the ground with a clatter, the other sword was also lying on the floor tainted in red, her hand moved to her left arm where the wound was bleeding and she covered it for a moment and closed her eyes, she was still trying to catch her breath. And she thought of all Zuku forced her to do in the past, she extended her hands in front of her eyes and rested the back of her arms on her legs looking at her palms. Her right palm now had blood in it, her blood. And yet she knew her hands were tainted with so much innocent blood, she winced and closed her eyes and then closed her hands into fists. She took a deep breath and sighed releasing the air. Her Seishi had once said that she could aim for vindication, redemption, if she were to become their Miko and save their kingdom but would that truly make amends for the countless lives she took? Would that render comfort to those who lost so many loved ones? Would it make her a better person even though she felt like scum? It was difficult for someone as proud as Akahana to have such little affection for the person she was, but it was partly obvious because Zuku made her me this way. And she hated the person she was. But if she voiced her thoughts it would ruin the reputation she had, everyone thought her incredibly strong and determined. If anyone was to ever see this side of her, they would think her weak and pathetic. But she spoke with no one, she had no friend or confident, no one knew of this inner turmoil inside her. Becoming the Miko had unknowingly become her bastion and she held on for dear life.

A warrior was usually harshly judged by those who could not wield a weapon. People always cheered for the valiant hero but once that warrior was defeated or fell in battle, the people would lose interest in them and would walk away as if noting had ever been risked or sacrificed for their well-being. People were selfish in many ways and yet, Akahana had decided to become the Miko and help the people of Kutou not only for her own merriment but also because she wanted this time to be the protector and not the assassin. But, would anyone truly see she was trying to break free from her past life? Would anyone actually value the fact that she was also a person who could feel despite the hardships of war? Violence changed a person, a warrior suffered greatly with every battle he or she faced and Akahana… and she suspected Shian shared in this burden to some extent. The difference lied in the fact that he was an honourable man who fought for his country and to protect his people, and she? Well, she was an assassin who killed whoever she was tasked to.

Furthermore, she learned she could not run away form her problems, they would always be right here waiting for her so, sooner or later, she would have to find a solution to this mess she was in. She did not want any of her Seishi to be dragged into it though, nor the person now tasked to begrudgingly protect her; she did not want to see them get hurt. She simply had to concentrate and gather everyone but…for the first time since she arrived to Kutou, she was afraid. It was much too silent, Zuku was no fool, she feared he might find a way to get to her.

It was then, as a great gust of wind caressed her long red hair that she felt someone approach her. On the one hand she feared it could be the one person she feared in either world, but no, she would feel the tension or something…no, this was the one person she was just thinking about. She felt her cheeks warm at that moment as if they had changed colour but she did not feel unwell. Was she catching a fever? As if hoping that the longer she remained where she was the sooner the feeling in her cheeks would disappear, she decided to stay where she was and allow the person to come to her and either show support or remind her that it was late and she had to get some sleep.

Maybe Shian was here to tell her how annoyed he was that she had woken him up with the noise of her practice swords or something, usually they could not see eye to eye. And yet, lately she felt something strange whenever he was nearby, she had decided it probably meant she was catching a cold or something, and yet whenever she spoke of this with Shun, the man would only smile and say she would find out on her own. Right…how could she do such a thing when she was not sure what it was like to be a human being? Maybe he was right, but it was difficult even now with this new life of hers she found it difficult to communicate or even show any emotion bar rage…Maybe she did need the help of her Seishi after all.

She felt him stand beside her and she was surprised he was not angry or upset, rather transmitted his inner peace to her and she was so shocked she did not know how to respond to this. Perhaps she had been wrong about the man after all. Their personalities did seem to clash often but, there were times when actually they could get on, and in a battle they were a great team, she had to admit. but in this world she discovered that life was much more than wielding a blade, as opposed to her life in her own world where everyday she was sent to kill someone…She sighed at the memories and decided to dismiss them for now and enjoy the company, it was rather comforting already and she would have thanked him if she knew how.

“The wise ones would have you believe that dreams hold no power, once you wake… They would tell you that a dream cannot hurt you… but they sleep sound in their elegant rooms in a polished palace, surrounded by guards, where they have no comprehension of real danger or fear. We, who are real, know what nonsense they speak.”

Her fiery scarlet eyes sone with mirth for a moment. It was a feeling she had slowly grown accustomed whenever she spoke with Shian. She was not a talkative person in all honesty, nonetheless, when it came to this man, their conversations were quite companionable and she found she enjoyed them. But that left her with the question of whether he also took enjoyment in such occasions or not. She knew he had a way with words and sometimes that would mask his true feelings or intentions. She had seen how Shian used such skills on other women, and yet, she realised with time that he never used that tactic on her. And that posed another question, was that because he knew she was on fool or could it be something else? But what? She took his word into mind before she said feeling a little bit better already, “Nonsense indeed, for what are dreams for the dreamless and wisdom for the unwise? Just words and, yet, objectively they hold more power than an Emperor, they cut deeper than a blade and can tame the greatest foe. And yet, once all is said and done, only darkness ensues and the people living in the real world must deal with the consequences. ‘Wise’ words in the mouth of the wicked can destroy a nation or bring it to its knees.”

And she knew, for she had experienced such darkness and despair and Zuku still lied in his mansion without any fear or uncertainty for he knew words granted him power over a whole nation. And yet, he did not posses the robes of an Emperor.

Such irony…

“It is no business of mine what you do with your personal time, Miko-san… but your physical security is my utmost concern.”

She could not help flinching at the words at first. It reminded her that he was her protector and nothing more. And yet it was that emptiness inside her that screamed for closeness with another living being just to remind her that she was among the living and not part of the dead. It was probably selfish of her due to the crimes she committed, but she had only known a friend of sorts in her whole life and she did not get any warmth or affection for long, she was still a young child when she lost her mother and had to run to survive. But something in the surprising gentleness of his voice made her think twice before commenting on how patronising that sounded. Mayhap, Kazune had helped her realise that she might also have a softer side in her and she was slowly learning more about it. She could try and open up to Shian as well. But she was not sure how to what to say. She opened her scarlet eye and responded in kind aiming for the same level of gentleness in her voice and hoping not to sound strange, “I guess things are catching up with me now…It is not as easy as anyone would think.” She turned to look at him and noticing the concern in his eyes over her injury she felt a bit warm on her cheeks, she was definitely getting sick or something and hoped he would not notice…

And yet there was something she was not telling him, but could she let him see a slightly more vulnerable side of hers just as he removed the mask of his usual pedantry if just for this moment? She blinked once and hoped she did not look a mess like the conflicting thoughts in her mind had been as soon s she woke up.

“I do not wish to go back to my world.” She even forgot about the wound on her left arm. That is, until he brought it up again. It was strange, he was not her Seishi and she was not his Miko, and yet at times she felt this inexplicable connection, like how she knew it was he who approached and, she suspected, he sensed her as she left the campsite.

“You’re going to have difficulty, binding that up on your own.”

“…on your own.”

His words echoed inside her. She was alone, at least she always had been. She worked alone, spoke with no one, not even Zuku and she had never had anyone patch her up whenever she got injured. Her eyes sparkled like the fireflies that slew around them as if looking or something or taking part in the melody of the night. The moonlight gave them both an etherial glow and she finally confessed, albeit in a whisper that she was not sure he would hear, “I’m always on my own.” Could she recall sharing a meal with someone? No… Simple things such as a mother’s embrace, a compliment, some words to show her someone was proud of her. She knew not these things.

And yet… Despite being used to walking away and tending to her own wounds, something inside her made her stay where she was and slowly outstretch her arm to allow Shian to tend to the wound. She was not sure what overcame her, or why she wished to let someone tent to her wound, she had never had anyone offer, even if he did not literally say so, he implied… She looked away for a moment, ignoring her own pride was difficult, but she knew that at that moment he would understand the symbolism and meaning of her actions. Or at least she hoped he would.[/blockqiote]

An unspoken tension kept him where he was, awaiting a sign of acceptance - or at least, a lack of intention to drive him away - before at last she extended her arm, and he sighed softly, face dissolving from the calm, steady composure that was so expected and essential in the loyal soldier. It left the usually stern, tan features with a softer, more human expression that somehow lent a bit less stiff formality to his continued, measured words. “Being alone is a choice, usually made to protect oneself, or others.” His fingers were gentle as he began to tend the injury, wiping at it for a few moments before deciding that the wound could use cleaning, and reaching for a flask of water at his hip. “And as you mentioned, protection can be required from a number of dangers - words perhaps the most injurious and pervasive among them.” Cool water trickled from the flask, and the cloth gently brushed aside debris and blood before he at last began to bind the injury properly. “However, as you sound discontented with your current choice… perhaps it is time to reflect upon who you are protecting, and what you are protecting them from.” There was a long pause, and then a frown wrinkled his brow subtly. “Surely, you do not believe that you require protection from me, Miko-san?”

Akahana looked up at Shian for a moment, she was rather amazed that he was being this considerate it made her feel as if he understood her better than she did. They never seemed to see eye to eye before but now they were actually conversing. Did he even know that ever since she came to Kutou, she had never spoken to others much? Zuku had influenced her so much that it became a surprise to her to express her frustrations so easily with Shian, something she had never done in all the years she had lived and she endured too many things… Maybe it was the fact that in a way his life seemed somewhat similar to her own in the fact that he was constantly putting his life in the line, he had had rough training and he was simply considered a soldier, as his job implied. Their hands were tainted with the blood of others, albeit not in the same situations but in the end the connection was there. Or, maybe it was his honesty and stubborn nature. He seemed so sure of every thought he had, and he had no problems with being himself before others. Whereas even in her present day Japan, it was unforgivable to be completely sincere to others especially in pubic, or so they said. Proof of it were the disgusted glances women would grant her when looking at her with her usual choice of clothing. Honestly, she only wore such clothes because she felt comfortable and since most of her life was consumed by her role as an assassin she did not have time to live a normal life and mingle with other persons wearing whatever was considered as ‘lady-like'. Zuku made sure she realised it was needless to make friends of acquaintances, on the one hand they could turn their backs on her if they discovered her little secret, secondly, if anyone wanted to get to her the easiest way was through harming those she cared for so… it was best if she remained alone. “I suppose you cannot avoid things forever… That among other reasons is why I have accepted my role… as the Miko.” She was not sure what good she could do for this land but if it could atone for her past she would give it a try.

She had considered the option of using one of the wishes in order to remain in the book… but was it not too selfish of her? She looked down for a moment. She would truly want to stay here but, Zuku was still out there and he would find her. She was not the best as emotions but something inside her told her she was not happy with the idea of Zuku coming here and destroying every person she had come to appreciate in this land. At times she even wished she could have been taken back to her world so that she could keep them all safe from that man, but she was still here and the peace and silence made her uncertain and restless. that was one of the reasons she barely slept at night, but she could not bring herself to tell anyone about this because… that would bring up the many things she experienced in the past and she was not sure she could ever talk about them. Upon looking at Shian though her resolution of going back to Japan almost disappeared. Why? What had happened to the woman who locked herself from those around her and never faltered once her mind was made up? She realised that before she knew it she was promising herself to make that decision if only it were possible. But she could not be so selfish, she could not sacrifice all these persons who welcomed her into Kutou and stand by her side despite not knowing anything about her… she could not hand them over to Zuku, especially not Kazune, Shian, Shun… no, she could not put their lives in more danger than they already were. They were… ‘precious’ to her. She almost gasped at the realisation but instead snapped back to reality as she watched Shian’s usual ‘soldier-like’ demeanour weaken and show, in its stead, a gentleness she had never seen before. It intrigued her and at the same time made her feel warm inside, she was not sure if the feeling was good as she had never felt like this before. But she was also grateful that he should trust her enough to reveal this hidden part of himself.

“Being alone is a choice, usually made to protect oneself, or others.”

At times she wondered if all these people truly were protecting her and offering her a helping hand just so that their Miko was safe? She still found it difficult to believe anyone would choose someone like her to be a Miko. Was she not supposed to be selfless, kind and pure? She was neither of those things. She was not selfless because she took lives wether they deserved it or not and killing could never be justified. She never even considered opposing Zuku, she had seen countless times the tragic fate of those who did. She had both feared and loathed him but she still did everything he ordered her to. She was not kind either, she was an assassin, a cold-blooded person who would never help others rather than herself, it was all Zuku taught herald she never had any means to live differently. Could old habits ever disappear? She seriously doubted it. Pure? Oh no, she had lost all innocence many years ago so how could someone want her to represent a whole kingdom and pray to a deity to heed her words and protect the land? It made no sense to her…

And yet… she was not the same…

She had changed somewhere along the way…

Ever since she came to these lands. She had been thrown into an unknown land and been told that she was the Miko selected by the god Seriyuu, protector of the kingdom of Kutou, and that she had to sacrifice herself for the well-being of this land. She had been too shocked to even acknowledge what was actually expected of her. But now, she would not hesitate telling Shian that she had accepted that fate willingly. So she was being selfless for those that needed her protection. It was the first time in her life that she fought not only to kill victims and stay alive and please Zuku in order to avoid punishments, but now she would be the protector and she would be granted the power of a god to ensure the safety of others come what may. She did not know what happened when you met the god and made the wishes, she did not know what happened afterward, but she still accepted this if it could bring some happiness and she could be remembered in this land as someone they could respect instead of loathe. Her eyes opened wide at that realisation but it did not stop there. She realised that she was learning kindness but not only in the care of her Seishi but also within, if she had admitted that she cared the slightest for her Seishi and Shian then that meant she could never do anything that would harm them and that even included… opposing Zuku if he ever did so much as lift a finger to harm them. And pure… perhaps she was no longer as innocent as when she was five years of age, but that was not by choice and she knew that if there was any purity in her persona that was thanks to Kazune’s influence, she was like a ray of hope after a dark tunnel, a fresh spring breeze after the cold winter. She was beginning to use the term “friend” when thinking of her. And Shian, he brought warmth and mirth to her life when it had been as cold as ice. “Sometimes it is less of a choice and more of a duty. Sometimes a choice can bring people together or push them apart. Sometimes you are in a limbo you cannot escape, even if you chose to.” She looked back into his eyes as she added, “Sometimes all you know is duty, whether it is to your Lord, country or… heart.”

“And as you mentioned, protection can be required from a number of dangers - words perhaps the most injurious and pervasive among them.”

She felt a bit dizzy but ignored that knowing it was more like a mental state and she had been thinking too many things in so little time… Were her Seishi and Shian nice to here only because she was their Miko? But if they learned who she truly was would they still support her? Would they not think if a mistake that she was being summoned? Suddenly their smiling faces came to her thoughts and she faltered slightly thinking of how painful it would be for her if they never spoke to her again upon learning of her past. She looked deeply into Shian’s eyes, he always looked out for her even when at times he would argue with her and he was true to his word. And she came to realise one of the things she admired about him was his honesty.

His words made her realise that she was afraid… afraid for the safety of the Seishi, Shian and the people of Kutou. She was afraid that Zuku might have planned her to come to this world all along and would use it to his advantage. Once Shian She placed one blade above her in a defensive arch and the other in front of her the blade facing upward as if both of her arms formed the circle of yin and yang. “And yet, a spoken word can strip you of your freedom of choice.”

She was not sure what was wrong with her this evening but she felt the desire to convey her feelings to this man, despite how briefly they have known each other and the little occasions they have had to converse like this, titles and ranks aside. Maybe that was one of the reasons, since both seemed willing to hear each other out, no teasing and no infuriating arguments. Just two persons with a deep desire to communicate in ways neither of them is able to grasp, not yet.

“However, as you sound discontented with your current choice… perhaps it is time to reflect upon who you are protecting, and what you are protecting them from.”

His words surprised her, she did not expect such understanding and comfort from their conversation and was not sure if he was aware of how gentle he was being. But she basked in the feeling and for a brief moment allowed herself the luxury of enjoying company. She looked down fo a moment feeling the comfort of the wind abasing her skin, how could she communicate without revealing something that would put them in grade peril? “I… I wish to protect everyone… from me. Nothing good could come from me… I will only bring destruction and pain to this kingdom… get everyone hurt, I would be powerless to stop it and it would be my fault.” The last words were a whisper, it was almost as if she were realising that in truth she had grown fond of the people in Kutou, including Shian, she had allowed them to approach and befriend her even though she had always kept her distance. How did they manage to sneak into her domains like ghosts at night?

She really had changed. For she knew without a doubt that she would sacrifice her very life, confront Zuku, she would do anything to keep them all safe. She nearly laughed at herself, she was nothing like the woman she used to be.

“Surely, you do not believe that you require protection from me, Miko-san?”

His words surprised her though and her eyes met his. She realised just how close they were and how sincere his gaze was. She could see hurt mixed with hope, she was not sure how to convey her response to his words. To measure him that such thoughts never crossed her mind. She did her best to grant him a brief smile, and he had to be one of the few persons to her see her smile. She kept their eyes locked, and shook her head to grant him the reassurance he so ardently sought. For a brief moment her hand lifted to gently and slightly caress his cheek while saying, “I… I trust you.” She surprised herself, but she would not take back anything she said in honesty.[/blockqiote][/blockquote

Duty? Of everyone that Akahana interacted with, Shian perhaps was most familiar with the concept of duty. The idea of having a role that was his, that he must complete because he was most capable, and because he was trusted with it. To him, ‘duty’ had always been a positive - an understanding that he had a place in the lives of people he cared about, and that he could be of value to those people. But the way she pronounced it… “The way you speak of duty, it does not sound like choice. It sounds like… a burden.” He shakes his head. “My duty is to my Emperor, my country-” He hesitated, and then added, “...and to our Miko.” Another hesitation, and his eyes went back to his fingers as they tended the injury, an odd sign of… discomfort? No… not that, quite. “Yes, my Emperor gave me an order to extend my protection to you… but I complete it as my duty both because I recognize its importance and value, and because I trust that any order he gives me is for the best of myself, those we care for, and the empire as a whole. I do my duty beneath his authority out of respect for his judgment, and the completion of that duty provides benefit and satisfaction.” He glances back to meet her gaze again. “The way you speak of it… it sounds more like a chore to be done in order to survive. Like… breathing.”

Her continuing words only confirmed his perception of her feelings, and he felt a lance of shock, which he was not entirely able to school out of his face. A friend to the Miko, he might not yet count himself among, but he’d known her long enough now to find her apparent fear of harming them - perhaps specifically him, based on context? - was stunning. “Protection from you?" His head shook slowly, expressing a mild disbelief. “Miko-san… you have never brought harm to me, or to any of our companions. And rest assured, I would know of it - to harm any of our associates, you would have to physically pass through myself to do so, and if you’ll pardon my own estimation, that is no mean feat. Why would you-?” Her fingers brushed his cheek then, robbing him of all coherent thought for a brief moment, and silencing all intention of further speech. Sparkling eyes met his with an intensity that canceled conscious conversation, and he blinked silently for several long seconds before, with a faint but noticeable jerk, he seemed to recover himself. “Then if you trust me, were you do not trust yourself… then trust me with it. So long as there is breath in me and strength in my body, I will not permit harm to come to any of the people you care for.” A faint smile, as he tried to recover. “Remember, I have cared for them, longer. I will not fail you in that.” Another, longer pause, before he cautiously - could it be said, ‘shyly’? - intones another point. “And of course, I will not fail in your personal protection. I will keep you safe.” A pause, then his eyes dart down again. “... that is, of course, my duty. My blood oath, upon it.”

“The way you speak of duty, it does not sound like choice. It sounds like… a burden… My duty is to my Emperor, my country...and to our Miko.”

To his last words Akahana blushed lightly, and yet she looked away for a moment in an attempt to calm her raiding heart. She had to go and see a physician soon, she had never experienced any of these feelings and now, it happened a lot. Particularly whenever she and Shian were close, even mores whenever he spoke in such a way. And yet, sometimes she wondered if his stoic persona prevented him from noticing these things he said and their effect on the Miko. How could one person mask any emotion behind such confident words and dedication? She could do the same but, she found the more time she spent inside the book the less ‘robotic’ she became. She experienced all sorts of emotions she could not name and the lack of experience in dealing with them made it difficult to her. She could not come to terms with any of this. Shun sometimes smiled whenever she mentioned this, and yet there was a gleam in his eyes of reconnaissance. But he never revealed anything. He sometimes kept his wisdom to himself and it infuriated her to some extent. He teased her so, even Shian did so sometimes. And yet, she could not be angry with them for long. She did not know why either. The more time she spent with all these people the less she knew herself. It wasn’t the same as becoming someone else, but she could not put her finger on the actual reason.

She thought of his words and smirked, tempted to tease him slightly and yet she knew the man could not help himself, “The duty of which you speak is honourable, in my homelands the ‘samurai’ were the men who followed such ethics the most and yet, you cannot deny the stiffness that comes with measuring your life within the scope of duty.” And yet duty was not always good. She did not agree that her interpretation of ‘duty’ was a burden in itself.

You could say both of them had similar personalities. But their lies were polar opposites. Starting with the fact that she could see the light in Shian’s eyes where she had only endured darkness. She had known a loving mother but she lost her too early, after that it was do or die. Shian was the samurai with the light shinning behind him and she was the shinobi with a darkness so cold behind her that could absolve everything in its path like a void, nothing escaped such darkness not even the glittering stars, not even the sun in all its radiance. Perhaps that is why he misinterpreted her concept of duty. “Not a burden, rather the awareness of beings you consider important that desire to be protected. It is a duty from the innermost part of the heart, beyond rationality.” And it was that dark void that followed her wherever she went that planted the seed of fear in her heart, fear of losing the few persons she cherished. “In my world benevolence, compassion, friendship and understanding are very rare. Not because they do not exist but because my path strayed too far from them.”

“Yes, my Emperor gave me an order to extend my protection to you… but I complete it as my duty both because I recognize its importance and value, and because I trust that any order he gives me is for the best of myself, those we care for, and the empire as a whole. I do my duty beneath his authority out of respect for his judgment, and the completion of that duty provides benefit and satisfaction… The way you speak of it… it sounds more like a chore to be done in order to survive. Like… breathing.”

She looked deeply into his amber eyes, her fierce scarlet abysses seeking to understand the meaning behind his words and his interpretation of her own. “From what I gather, Shun is a just Emperor and anyone under his banner would be honoured to follow him. Jet, duty and choice are not always bound together, in duty one may ignore something that could be done instead due to better reasoning, in the world of ethics deontological choices can help shape a civilisation but they weaken the humanity in persons if consequences are not considered, as good as the motives can be the heart and the reason can sometimes collide. The only thing that could bind them together to a more effective degree would be to follow one’s duty is good will alone. And yet, there are still so many things to consider, it must be honourable in every possible content, it must be beneficial for everyone, regardless of a person’s desires and yet it is free from the chains of desire, context and objectives.”

She noticed one of the fireflies stood on her free hand and she gently extended the finger for it to perch on it. Creatures had always fascinated her but she was nee allowed the luxury to enjoy some free time. In Japan she was a weapon of destruction, she was not allowed to have a ‘life’. “Your concept of duty may be found in trust. As a body-guard and devoted friend to the Emperor, you learned to trust for it had a reliable basis and it could grow with the appropriate dedication.” The firefly decided to leave her finger and her eyes moved back to his own, they reminded her of fireflies, it was that light within them. “Yes, duty can also be like breathing for those whose life has not taught them otherwise.” She was one of them and she believed that due to the darkness in her life and the treacherous deeds she committed, if she was not duty-bound to anything, she would have been lost to the darkness long ago. It ensured she remained a human being, if barely.

She noticed the shock on his face. It surprised her in turn. Did she speak out of turn? She truly had to learn to read the situations better. Perchance he did not consider himself a friend and only her bodyguard. Perhaps all their conversations and interactions until now had been out of his duty-bound situation. She felt her cheeks grow warm once more. She definitely would ask Shun to take her to see physician again this was ridiculous. She probably looked like a fool to him.

“Protection from you? Miko-san… you have never brought harm to me, or to any of our companions. And rest assured, I would know of it - to harm any of our associates, you would have to physically pass through myself to do so, and if you’ll pardon my own estimation, that is no mean feat. Why would you-?”

She looked away for a moment, “Akahana, I understand your duty as a protector and your position in the Empire but, I would prefer it if you dropped the honorific I was not born into nobility in my home-world and I am not part of it in this one.” Besides… She nearly blushed as she realised bot them to get closer, she wanted to be close to someone. Not just anyone though, Shian was a gentleman in eery way, he was intelligent and enjoyed their conversations as if it were pastime with good company and she had never had that before. He was also a bit stoic and stiff and it made her smile at times. In fact she was smiling for a brief moment at that time also, she would need tell him this but, there were times when he would be so passionate about the things he said that she would find him… endearing and sweet. She nearly snickered at the thought of him learning these thoughts, why he would deny them and even keep doing so in his grave. She did her best to stay in the conversation though, she did not wish to appear rude after all.

She looked down for a moment at her hands, “A person’s past can haunt them, and when that happens someone can get hurt.” And that someone would be everyone she cared for in this kingdom. “I know of your skills to read situations, to learn more about a person than they wish to reveal of themselves…” Because she had those very skills as well. Both had the talent of observation. “Surely you must know, my hands are tainted…” To say the least… Both were warriors and had used their weapons avidly, Shian would have fought for the Empire and dirtied his hands too but in her case she had killed innocents. People she did not know, and their loved ones would gripe them for as long as they lived. She endangered their lives just by being there with them. Zuku would most probably find the book, read its contents and realise where she was. He would spare no time or resources to come find her and when that time came, she was not sure what they could all do against a charismatic and powerful man who owned the very best shinobi and none of them could betray him. Some called it a brotherhood of assassins but to her he was a mafia leader with aspirations to be considered a warlord. “And yet, I would do anything to spare you all any of all experience with the darkness of my life.” Yes, she knew now that she would gladly give her life to sae them all. seemed to lure her into a sense of comfort that resulted in her taking such liberties without considering how he would react to these.

“Then if you trust me, were you do not trust yourself… then trust me with it. So long as there is breath in me and strength in my body, I will not permit harm to come to any of the people you care for.”

He was trying to reassure her, truly. She had spent enough time alongside him to know when he was trying to comfort her and in a way it caused her to smile if for a brief moment. For someone so stoic he could be quire caring, mind you she would need tease him of such, she respected him as a fellow warrior and knew how much honour and pride meant especially when he directly served and represented the Empire.

“Remember, I have cared for them, longer. I will not fail you in that.”

She looked into his eyes for a moment before she pointed out the one issue with such promise, “And yet you would put in line the life of one of the persons I care for.” He would risk his life to protect them all but then… who would protect him? “You see? I could not sacrifice one of you even if one person could save the rest, I might not sound rational and consequential in my contest of duty, but I rather not sacrifice anyone.” Perhaps she was too optimistic on her intake but she would not forgive herself if anything happened to Shian, especially because it would be her own fault.

“And of course, I will not fail in your personal protection. I will keep you safe... that is, of course, my duty. My blood oath, upon it.”

Something in the way he said those words stunned her, she caught her breath and realised no one had ever tried to protect her or keep her safe. She had been her own warrior, her own protector and depended on no one. Some could perhaps admire her independent spirit, but there was something alluring about coming across a man who could rival her skills in battle, her wit in conversation and mirth and who would wish to be her protector and cherish her as something precious. “I…” She did not know what to say to such an oath, was he truly aware of what he spoke?

Upon analysing this, however, she blinked and blushed, he was making such meaningful pledge to an assassin? To someone like her? She looked deeply into his eyes extracting the meaning of such words, trying to understand his message and her confusion, trying to analyse everything she was feeling and yet she still could not understand it. It was making her heartbeat erratic and for a moment her eyes stopped at the line of his lips as he smiled and spoke and she wondered if he had ever kissed anyone with his eloquent lips. Were they gentle or rough with the years of military service?

She mentally slapped herself, he was a warrior, there were several ladies at court would deserved his attentions, they were feminine and had no blood in their hands. Besides he had a duty to his Lord and country, she did not fit in any of this. In an attempt to move away and calm her heart she moved her left foot. Unbeknownst to her there was a little bit of mud in that area and she slipped. As she had been facing Shian she ended up falling onto him. She realised their faces were truly close by then and she was so shocked she did not know what to do. She had never been in such a situation before and it embarrassed her deeply. She wanted to dig a hole and hide herself in the depths of the earth.[/blockqiote][/blockquote

His face creased, troubled in a way that he hadn't anticipated, when he'd followed her here from the fire. His intention had been to ensure that she was safe, and perhaps to offer what meager comfort he could, as one experienced with a life of fighting could provide to another. He was no stranger to nightmares himself: after all, he hadn't started off immediately as Shun's personal guard. No, a commoner despite his privileged upbringing, he'd joined the Imperial Army as a younger man - more a child, really - and had seen his battles and his death, as much as any soldier. And since assuming his current position, he'd killed many in defense of his Emperor, putting his own body into the gap in order to ensure that Shun survived. Injuries he'd had, and the kind of trauma that came with the position... and that had been how he'd known, when she rose from the fire, that his immediate presence would not be welcomed. Blood in the mind could not be shaken so easily - it had to be exhausted, first. But now, upon reflection on her words, he realized that the blood of his own nightmares could be shaken more easily than hers, if only because he had the security of a group of friends that cared for him, whom he would give his life for... who would do the same in turn, he knew, not that he would have permitted it. She did not have that luxury. It was no wonder such doom could take hold in her thoughts.

"I am no more honorable than the next man," he said at last, answering her spoken words because he was still hesitating as to how to respond to the rest. "I merely have the honor of serving a just Emperor, and having people who care that my life should have peace and success. In exchange for that, I am happy to serve my duty. That does not imply that I am possessed of honor, myself - on the contrary, it bestows honor upon me that is not mine to own." He shrugs a little. "Raised alongside the Emperor or not, I am an ordinary man. I have no rank or title that the sweat of my own brow and the shedding of my own blood has not brought to me, and which more of the same are not required in order to retain. My hands are bloodsoaked, as well - by necessity. By the need of having to prove my use and function in order that I might be permitted to both survive, and retain my privileges. I am fortunate enough that the power I serve has never asked me to perform any action that is contrary to my feeling of what is just and right, but-" A sigh, and he meets her gaze again. "Gods above, if Shun lost his mind and that ceased to be true... I would regret it, but I would part ways with my duty." A pause, and then a rumble. "And then, I would seek out the one who turned my friend so against his nature, and their blood would find my hands." His tone was dark then, speaking of something deep in the man that would gladly do more than simply kill such a person.

"And yet you would put in line the life of one of the persons I care for. He would risk his life to protect them all but then… who would protect him?"

Her voice was soft, difficult to catch even from his close distance, and yet the words stopped him cold, sending another shock past the calm endurance and causing him to blink once, harshly, and then again. "Protect me?" He tried to laugh a little, as if he were amused by her concern, rather than confused and... oddly warmed by it. The sound was artificial though, even to his own ears. "I have survived two wars and seven separate assassination attempts... I assure you that it is not so simple as you imagine, to end me. In fact-" She moved to stand then, and though he moved to brace her as she did, her foot slipped, sending her careening into him. Her elbow met his ribs with a pronounced thump, and his breath came out in a soft grunt as he adjusted, trying to steady her feet beneath her. "Akahana?!" He did not initially realize how their movement put her so close to him, within a breath of a kiss, instead breathing a little harder thanks to the unintentional blow he'd taken, and his gaze fixed upon her feet as he attempted to ensure she wouldn't fall. "Did you sprain it? I didn't think-" His gaze went back to her face, and upon seeing how close she was, he swallowed hard. His heartrate immediately kicked up, and he stammered softly to a halt, staring at her intently, mostly because he was too shocked to do anything else.

Akahana had never had such a complex discussion with anyone, in fact, she had never spoken for more than five words in the same conversation. She was a tool of destruction and Zuku never saw fit to talk to her like a normal human being, he also knew of her childhood trauma and that only made her the best candidate to be dehumanised, stripped from all emotions and connections with others and just carry out his instructions to the letter. Thus, Akahana was not sure what she had expected to come out of this conversation with Shian. Perhaps the fact that he approached her to check up on her and also render her comfort form the nightmares that assailed her inspired her to share with him things she had need shared with anyone else. But that was the thing, it was the first time she had ever done that and, she was not sure how to do it successfully, but also, her sharing things also depended on how Shian took this information and what he concluded from all of it. Would he stick around or walk away? And yet, it was the bits in their pasts hat connected them that inspired her to trust, he would never walk away on her. Especially not after she shared this with him.

For the most part she had enjoyed it thoroughly and wished they could spend more time together in such conversation. He did not dislike her speaking her mind and she enjoyed hearing what he thought on the subjects. Even if they did not agree on a topic she still found the exchange delightful and refreshing and it made her feel elated. Was that the word? And yet, it was something else that she could not analyse among the few emotions she had experienced in her life. Could it be what other people referred to as happiness? The fact that she shared some of her burdens, albeit indirectly as she was not entirely sure how to share her pain with others. But… it did not seem to stop Shian from understanding what she was trying to say for she noticed in the way his facial expression changed. IN her own clumsy way she was covering the message. Certainly he could understand the darkness that befell a person whenever they were involved in the art of war. To wield a weapon was to accept the path of a person that could potentially use it and take a life. He knew what it was like to carry the burden of the lives taken like Akahana did. They were so alike and somewhat different. Her loneliness was an impediment to her handling things better. All she could do in most cases was release her pent up frustrations by practicing on her own or with someone to spar. And yet, ever since Shian entered her life she found herself closer and closer to being human and she was not aware of it. Not only was he her perfect sparing partner but she could speak as her broken self and he would reconstruct her and listen, he would understand and comfort her. And he would not judge her.

That was very important.

He never made her feel bad for a life she could do nothing about… until she was sent to this world that is.

Yes, he probably was not aware of how much he had helped Akahana. And yet she was not sure how to convey her gratitude without sounding foolish, embarrassing or arrogant. She nearly face-slapped. She had been so unlucky in her tender years she did not know what to do with emotions now and it worried and scared her that she did not even know what each emotion she was feeling was. It was ironic that the man who openly sought to comfort her always seemed to hesitate she it came to feelings. It was ironic because in that aspect they are so similar for different reasons. But then, after all this time, perhaps obsessing about her struggles with emotions wold not help her. Perhaps she simply had to experience them and analyse them one by one, and that might teach her about being human in ways that no book could. Didn’t they say experience was key? And she had never had any experience on the matter, so it would be best to analyse them and experience them in her own time. And Shian might have just given her the key to unlocking this problem. She probably would look strange to him with the amount of times her cheeks had felt warm in his presence.

“I am no more honorable than the next man… I merely have the honor of serving a just Emperor, and having people who care that my life should have peace and success. In exchange for that, I am happy to serve my duty. That does not imply that I am possessed of honor, myself - on the contrary, it bestows honor upon me that is not mine to own… Raised alongside the Emperor or not, I am an ordinary man. I have no rank or title that the sweat of my own brow and the shedding of my own blood has not brought to me, and which more of the same are not required in order to retain. My hands are bloodsoaked, as well - by necessity. By the need of having to prove my use and function in order that I might be permitted to both survive, and retain my privileges. I am fortunate enough that the power I serve has never asked me to perform any action that is contrary to my feeling of what is just and right, but-“

Yes, that was where their differences lay. While Akahana never joined the Master she served willingly nor could she escape his clutches if she tried, for many experienced assassins perished by his hand when found escaping or double-crossing, and she had to kill to stay alive. It was a game to Zuku all the same, the horrors he subjected her to, the things he made her do and all to see how far he could take her, how much she could endure before she broke for good. She did not have a ray of hope that helped her feel good or happy about her life and that made her succumb to the shadows. “Yes, from what I have seen and experience the Emperor is just and considerate. Alas, not all persons in power are the same.” Zuku was the complete opposite to Emperor Shun and she rather not think about him any more than she already had, least it should summon him to this world to destroy her and all she held dear.

But now. When Shian spoke of the Emperor he served she found herself reflecting on her life in Kutou and all the people she had met who had made her feel welcome, who gave her the chance to do something meaningful, that made her part of a collective and inspire in her the desire, like a fiery beacon of hope, to protect a whole kingdom and do anything for the few people she considered irreplaceable. Perhaps in following the path Shian walked, she would find the inner peace and a place to truly call her home. That meant she was betraying Zuku and sooner or later she would have to confront him, would she be ready for this? Would she be strong enough? He had broken her in more ways than one, how could she be sure that when the time came to confront him she would not fall on her knees and bow to him again? She looked into his eyes, perhaps the connection with these people, with Shian, would render her the strength needed to break free. “Albeit my past cannot be amended, your words ring with truth regarding that… the same rules do not apply in this kingdom and my life here was granted anew… perhaps it is time I seek a different path and help the kingdom that welcomed me, cherish the connections I have made and aid the Emperor that lent me a helping hand. And yet, I know not what may befall the kingdom. I am unable to shake off the uneasiness of knowing something is coming… and that something from my world is… dangerous…” Zuku would not sit idly and let her live a happy life away from him. He spent years breaking her…

"Gods above, if Shun lost his mind and that ceased to be true... I would regret it, but I would part ways with my duty… And then, I would seek out the one who turned my friend so against his nature, and their blood would find my hands.”

And that was his choice, in the end his duty was to what he thought was right, he did not consider the consequences of serving a lord. Shun was the exception but there had been Kings and Emperors and politicians in general in history that abused their power, ignored their advisors even those they had once considered friends and punished whoever wished to break free form the shackles of such servitude. Not many could have the luxury of walking away from an oath given to always serve a Lord no matter the cost. And yet his last words surprised her and she saw, for the first time, a darkness in his eyes. If he ever had an enemy that person would definitely perish in horrible ways. She looked away for a moment, she never thought he would hold people so dear to him he would sacrifice his heart in order to prevent them from straying from their path. And then she wondered if he would also defend her with as much fierceness if someone wished to do her any harm. What would he do if he faced Zuku? She thought for a moment, it was probably silly of her to compare the importances, he had grown alongside the Emperor, they were practically brothers and their bond was unbreakable. She knew few things about him and the same could be said about how little he knew of her. So how could she expect their bond to be strong?

She felt so pathetic she nearly smirked in self-loathing. How could she compare both situations, they were so different… Surely Shian was only making sure she was well, she received some comfort and she was protected for as long as she were the Miko, as the well-being of his nation depended on her… And she appreciated that, but her heart ached and she did not know why… She was making all these assumptions… Maybe she needed to find a way to close up all these feelings once again and simply do her job as the Miko.

"Protect me? I have survived two wars and seven separate assassination attempts... I assure you that it is not so simple as you imagine, to end me. In fact-“

His reaction to her earnest words confused her and annoyed her somewhat. What warrior would not wish to protect someone they held dear? As difficult as it was for her to confess she cared about Kutou, the people she had met and him… his answer was to laugh? Although, her anger subsided the moment she noticed how strange it sounded compared to other days when they had one of those conversations that few people enjoyed having. Could it be his way of dealing with emotions? Truth be told she was far beyond expect at it, she was still trying to figure it all out. But she knew that what she said was what her heart dictated, “Yes, you.” She then tried to soften her argument, “Is it not a normal thing, an instinct, to protect those you consider important? Even when one can be as helpless as a newly born baby?” And she was far from helpless, she was a professional after all.

“Akahana?! Did you sprain it? I didn't think-"

When she clumsily crashed onto Shian she was so shocked and embarrassed she had not moved a muscle trying to analyse what she was experiencing at that moment and she still did not know, but it felt somewhat mortifying. What happened next, his words, his reaction in trying to catch her and stop her from falling over made her snap back to reality. And that was not a good thing because it made her cheeks turn the rosy colour of sunrise. Not only that, but it made her eyes refocus on what was right in front of her. And that was an incredibly shocked Shian. He reacted the same way she had, and she could tell he shared the same emotions she did. She wanted to stand up and run away from him and apologise and never trouble him again.

But the way he so intently looked into her eyes erased all her thoughts, all her awareness. At that very moment all that existed was the both of them. She could sense his breathing, her heartbeat increased and her scarlet eyes burned like fire. She could not even form the right words to apologise for her clumsiness, she was absolutely speechless but her heart decided to release all sorts of alien emotions that she did not know what to do with. The moonlight gave them an ethereal glow and she realised how handsome he looked at that moment.

All she seemed to focus on was the way Shian’s eyes sparked, albeit with shock, and how close their lips were and almost as if an inner force, that she had not realised was there in the depths of her heart and soul, pushed her forth. Her heart wanted her to take a leap of fate and express these emotions she was experimenting but something stopped her for a moment, made her hesitate. What if Shian felt nothing for her? And yet that fleeting thought disappeared as soon as her lips met his in a passionate kiss. She had not realised her body acted on its own and her eyes had closed. And yet she did not regret it.

“Albeit my past cannot be amended, your words ring with truth regarding that… the same rules do not apply in this kingdom and my life here was granted anew… perhaps it is time I seek a different path and help the kingdom that welcomed me, cherish the connections I have made and aid the Emperor that lent me a helping hand. And yet, I know not what may befall the kingdom. I am unable to shake off the uneasiness of knowing something is coming… and that something from my world is… dangerous…”



A frown highlighted a few creases in his face, around the corner of the eyes and mouth, and through the skin of the forehead. It made him look older than his true age, highlighted a life that, while happy, had featured tribulations of its own. “As you say, your life here has been granted anew. The path you choose-” He hesitated, shook his head, and picked up in a different place. “I am the unwanted, bastard son of a minor noble whom I know by name and reputation only. The path that was provided to me as a young, unwanted child was very confined: to be a servant in my own father’s house, less even than that, because his legitimate wife… chose to treat my birth as my own choice, as though I meant to be born, simply to shame her. And I was to be grateful for that amount of consideration…” A shrug, showing that held no import to him. “In a way, circumstances also threw me into a change over which I had no control - I was shipped off to become a companion for the Emperor when he was a young boy, largely to get me out of my father’s household, to please his wife. And even then, my role was defined for me: I was a companion to him, but not his equal. A perfectly obedient, subservient friend who was to let him win all the games, have the first and best of all things, and fetch and carry for any person in the palace. So I was given to understand by my father, when he delivered me here. But-” Another shrug, and he cleared his throat once more. “The path that I chose… was to be a friend to a young boy, who had a thousand servants at his beck and call, and no need of more. To accompany and protect someone that I cared for, rather than elect the simple, mindless following of orders that might have seen my status elevated more quickly. Legitimate or not, with my bloodline, I could have made myself powerful or influential… but that is not where my duty and my heart lie. I have made the choices I have - and so I am little more than a glorified soldier. But they enable me to live my life as I choose to, serving a cause and a person that I believe in.” He turned his gaze back to her, expression meaningful and heavy. “Your path has diverged, and two lay before you. The next choice - and what harm or glory it may bring to all of us - is your own.” A pause. “And in whatever choice you make, it is my duty - impressed by myself and my own nature as much as my Emperor - to support you in that choice, in whatever capacity is needful.”



“Is it not a normal thing, an instinct, to protect those you consider important? Even when one can be as helpless as a newly born baby?”



He’d annoyed her, somehow. What had he said…? Oh… “No, that’s not-” He swallowed, and cursed within the privacy of his mind. There was a reason that he’d never be a diplomat. “You are, of course, perfectly capable of looking after yourself. What I meant was… I guess I’d never considered that you might… consider me important enough to protect.” That was both an honest expression of his surprise, and a way to further distance himself from it. Unfortunately, he was so occupied with attempting to extricate himself from this awkward phrasing that he did not foresee her upcoming action. His arm was around her to support her footing, a breath between them and then-! Her lips met his, and a startled noise left him. Too shocked to immediately withdraw - or to even decide for himself how he felt about the kiss itself - he endured it without response as he struggled to force the gears inside his mind to turn. When finally they clicked, it was sudden and dramatic, causing him to pull back from the kiss with a soft pop of air, and a set of wide, golden eyes. Unfortunately, his body moved before his brain caught up, and beneath him, his foot caught a gnarled root, stumbling him and sending him reeling, arms akimbo, to land squarely on his backside with an audible sound of both surprise and pain.

“As you say, your life here has been granted anew. The path you choose-”

She saw a chance in his countenance, as if he debated whether or not to trust her with some sensitive bit of information. She had seen it before back in her other life, whenever she interrupted people without the means of torture and earner their trust. She nearly winced, eery time she remembered the world she came from she felt shame, disgust and abhorrence. Perhaps, she needed to take her words more seriously and only think the past as something she does not want to happen in this world and not forget, for she should never forget about her enemy, but rather stay alert should he find a way to come to this world and wreak havoc. She decided to give him time to gather his thoughts and decide if he should trust her or not with such information. Although, without realising it she felt something inside of her stir at the thought that Shian would trust her with any information regarding his persona. She wondered for a moment if this was what ‘joy’ felt like but she decided to leave that for another time when she had a clear head to think about the things she had been experiencing since she arrived in Kutou.

“I am the unwanted, bastard son of a minor noble whom I know by name and reputation only. The path that was provided to me as a young, unwanted child was very confined: to be a servant in my own father’s house, less even than that, because his legitimate wife… chose to treat my birth as my own choice, as though I meant to be born, simply to shame her. And I was to be grateful for that amount of consideration… In a way, circumstances also threw me into a change over which I had no control - I was shipped off to become a companion for the Emperor when he was a young boy, largely to get me out of my father’s household, to please his wife. And even then, my role was defined for me: I was a companion to him, but not his equal. A perfectly obedient, subservient friend who was to let him win all the games, have the first and best of all things, and fetch and carry for any person in the palace. So I was given to understand by my father, when he delivered me here. But-The path that I chose… was to be a friend to a young boy, who had a thousand servants at his beck and call, and no need of more. To accompany and protect someone that I cared for, rather than elect the simple, mindless following of orders that might have seen my status elevated more quickly. Legitimate or not, with my bloodline, I could have made myself powerful or influential… but that is not where my duty and my heart lie. I have made the choices I have - and so I am little more than a glorified soldier. But they enable me to live my life as I choose to, serving a cause and a person that I believe in.”

Akahana was a bit surprised at first. It was true that due to the seriousness of his countenance she could tell that he was debating whether to tell her something about himself or not, she did not expect Shian to confide in her and she realised that it inspired gratitude in her. It also pleased her, in a way, to know he would share something so intimate about himself. After all, she did want to get to know him better even if she did not admit it herself. She knew why she had set up boundaries between herself and others back in the modern world, but in her heart she wanted to get close to others, not just anyone as well. She looked into his eyes taking in everything he said, it appeared they had much more in common than expected. In a way, she could tell form the moment that they met that there was an unspoken agreement between them, as if their lives had been harsh and though Shian had a respectable position and served a noble Emperor, Akahana knew that it was those hardships that had drawn them to each other. And now, it was crystal clear to her. Albeit happy to have proven her suspicions correct something still troubled her. She wondered if he would accept her as she was with all the crimes she committed. She did not want to do any of it, but she still did. Would he see through the pain she experienced every day as a result of the guilt and regret of her past? Or would he turn his back to her and walk away in disapproval and disgust?

After he told her about his past, she decided to speak her mind on the subject, “Life has been hard on you, but I am glad that your tenacity led you to work for a just Emperor and that was a path of your choosing. It might be forward of me but I do not believe in canons dictated by society where a person is considered undeserving of that for which he works diligently. Whatever the past, whatever the family you have been given, you are now a proud guard to the Emperor and should be proud of it.” She blushed slightly but did not look away as she added, “It also made you an honourable man and I got to meet you.” For someone who was always silent and seldom spoke to others, Shian seemed to draw a more human person of herself and it surprised her greatly how much she had been talking her since she arrived in Kutou. She was not displeased, however, as she analysed this, feeling more human was not an unwelcome sensation.

“Your path has diverged, and two lay before you. The next choice - and what harm or glory it may bring to all of us - is your own… And in whatever choice you make, it is my duty - impressed by myself and my own nature as much as my Emperor - to support you in that choice, in whatever capacity is needful.”

She was a bit taken aback by his words. No matter what she chose they would stand by her side come what may. She could lead them into eternal darkness and they would walk this path with her? She blinked and looked away for a moment. It was surreal to have this feel of support and to be reminded of how important it would be for her to make the decision that most benefits this nation and its people. She wasn’t an ambassador to justice and she had no experience as an advisor or a person who makes those kinds of decisions. She was a lowly assassin who had been given the chance to run away from such life. But that did not mean she had any experience or had all the answers everyone needed at present. Nevertheless, she knew in her heart that she cared for this kingdom, its people and the persons she has interacted with so far, and that would be enough to guid her in the right direction. When the time came, she knew she would have all the answers she would need. “I am not versed in rhetoric or politics to the extent that I know what the best course of action would be, nevertheless, I will follow the path keeping this kingdom and its people in mind for it has granted me a new life and, as such, I must protect the smiles of everyone whatever it takes.” If she had to lie down her life for the future of Kutou, she know now no questions asked, that she could do it.

“No, that’s not-You are, of course, perfectly capable of looking after yourself. What I meant was… I guess I’d never considered that you might… consider me important enough to protect.”

That hit the nail on the head. And she knew it because she began to blush upon hearing his words. She had just admitted that as well, that he was ‘important’ to her and it made her embarrassed to hear it. But she would not deny it, she could not. She had come out clean and she would not retrace her steps now. She looked into his amber eyes and nodded, “You are important to me.” And she found herself thinking that he was more important than he would ever know. And it was both a scary and an amazing feeling that she welcomed. Now that she had spoken she could not and would not take it back.

Of course nothing could have her prepared her for what happened next. She was not sure how or why but her heart took a hold of her and she kissed his lips. At first she thought he would immediately pull back, glare at her and walk away thinking she was another one of those silly noblewomen who were always giving him attentions and he always seemed eager to get rid of, even though his mannerisms did not show such. But instead the kiss lingered for a moment, long enough that she blushed deeply and looked away for a moment before realising his strange reaction. Her brain trailed faster than light analysing what happened next, at first she thought he might be rejecting her, but that was not what had happened. If he were appalled by her action he would have had a more reserved reaction, so did this mean he… enjoyed it? It made her happy and at the same time blush. And yet as he stumbled and fell, and she could tell he injured himself, she was immediately kneeling right beside him with a hand on his shoulder and her face inches away from his in an attempt to make sure he was okay.

And something else happened.

Something which, she had not experienced in a ‘very’ long time… A soft sound, at first, which slowly increased in intensity emanated from her throat. Was she… laughing? Yes, she was laughing and it was a rather pleasant sound, like the soft ringing of bells, her eyes closed for a moment as she laughed at such a comical situation and enjoyed it. Last time she laughed like this she had been five years of age, before her life changed radically. The moment her eyes opened she felt tears forming, and she was not sure why but she did not care. After laughing for a long moment she placed a hand on her heart, it had felt whole then, what a strange and yet welcoming sensation. Her scarlet eyes were still sparkling with mirth as she turned to look back at him, steal leaning close to him and then she said surprisingly softly, “Shian, do we need to get some practice for you to get used to it?” It was a light tease but she was surprised at his reaction. She had never seen anyone freak out so much that they should get injured after being kissed. It nearly made her laugh once more. She looked into his eyes for a brief moment before she added, “Because, albeit surprised at first, I meant what I did.” What she was trying to say was that these feelings were honest. Her fingers caressed his cheek for a moment before her lips met his and yet this time it was a short kiss. She sat back for a moment and looked at the sky, she might as well set up camp where they were, she did not want his pride being hurt and she was enjoying the time they were spending together.

She turned to look at him and said, “Don’t you dare move. I’ll be right back.” She then decided to first cut a bamboo branch from a tree and empty it on the inside but ensure to keep the lid. She then got some wood to start a fire and some dry leaves. Lastly, she scouted the area and luckily she found some wild ginger root and some turmeric. That would help with Shian’s injury and lower the swelling. Just from the sound she could tell what had happened and she was certain that his pride would prevent him from letting her have a look and apply any remedies, therefore, she would make him a tea to drink. Good thing she had a bit of lemon and honey with her.

She returned and silently began to work on the fire, she arranged some pebbles around in order to contain the fire and then arranged some branches and dry leaves, she took out her flint and tinder and rubbed them in an attempt to create a fire spark. Once that happened she fed the fire and blew on it patiently. After that she took out the bamboo cane and then filled it with water and after covering it she ensured to keep it close enough to the fire for the water to boil. After that she took out the turmeric and with a small knife she cut it into tiny pieces and tried to get as much of the juices form the as possible and she also peeled the ginger and cut it into small pieces. After fifteen minutes she added the ingredients to the water boiling inside the bamboo stick. She also tried to help him sit as comfortably as possible and avoid the pressure to be on the affected area. While she did all this she spoke softly and moved to sit right next to him seeking the body warmth and comfort needed to open up in a way she had never done before, “I’ve always looked after my own injuries, I have had many, some which… I did not expect to recover from.” She looked at the burning flames for a moment before she added, “I was born an unwanted child to my father, so my mother was left to look after me. We were very poor, and no matter what she tried, she was unable to make ends meet for the most part. In her despair she looked for comfort elsewhere.” She swallowed and her scarlet eyes sparkled with the flames, “I was around five when that life came to an end, my mother’s lover would beat her up at any opportunity and he soon decided it would be amusing to target her daughter instead.”

She looked back up at the stars, “I always ran away, whenever this happened I had a place I could go to, by the ocean shores. Few people spent time there, especially at night. One day, he killed her and I ran away until I passed out. I was alone and had no one to run to.”

Once ready she removed the ingredients and cast them into the fire, she removed the lid, added a hint of honey and lemon and offered the bamboo cane to him while saying, “Needless to say it is hot, but it will relieve the pain and help with the swelling.”

Despite siting in front of the fire she felt cold at the memories. She shivered lightly and felt her eyes get teary, what a strange thing. She thought she had no more tears left to cry. She did not want to look so weak in front of Shian though, but something inside her wanted to share this part of her with someone she held dear. And there was no one she wanted to do this more than with Shian.

At the moment his behind met the ground, Shian knew what had happened. He had been a guard long enough - and an active fighter, before that - to recognize the injury he’d sustained. Oh, not in medical terms, perhaps… but he knew enough to be able to say he wouldn’t be lying on his back for a good week, nor sitting upon his behind for a while after that. And walking… She knelt to meet him then, and his thoughts were interrupted as she drew close enough that he actually flinched, drawing back in fear that she would attempt to kiss him, again. But no, she… she laughed. He had been laughed at plenty of times in his life, by people with far more power and influence, and many more dignified people would have been insulted at her mirth, but having grown up in the company of both Shun and Ryou… well, after all, that was exactly what either of them would have done, had they been here to see it. Perhaps that was why he found her laughter oddly comforting, enough that he was forced to join her himself, after a few moments, a soft chuckle that slowly grew in certainty and volume. “I… am usually a bit more light-footed than this…” He was ready to pass off any real embarrassment - by ignoring the kiss itself and refusing to admit needing any assistance, or any injury for that matter - when she let out with a tease, followed by another kiss that caught him aback equally as much as the first had. Perhaps there was one benefit, in that he was already flat on his behind and far too uncomfortable to move, so despite the fact that he stiffened a little, he couldn’t exactly flee a second time. So he endured the second kiss with a smidge more dignity, if not any less alarm, and was too stunned to respond when she immediately thereafter ordered him to stay still, and then left.



When she returned a few minutes later, he would be clear that he had moved… but either experience with this kind of injury, or wariness of her reaction ensured that he had only adjusted enough to take the pressure off of his injured backside, rolling a little until he was resting more on his left hip than on his offended… dignity. He’d left his own bag back at their original campsite, so he couldn’t even access the basic medical supplies that he typically kept with him, and so he sat in a kind of stunned silence while she fetched things and brewed a tea for him. It wasn’t until she finally ventured conversation again that he stirred from his… almost frightened endurance of her company, and then to answer her initial words with a profound sigh. “And there, but for the grace of Seriyuu…” He shook his head. “For having a history so similar to my own… you seem to have had all the worst of it, while I had all the best… at least, the best that I have any business to expect, given my heritage. To treat a child that way…” The makeshift teacup in her hand sat forgotten, for his attention had shifted dramatically, and a harshness came into his features. “We have laws against that kind of thing, and there is a reason. Yes, I was treated with contempt, but never…” His head shook, and a tightness set into his jaw. “For all that she hated me, his wife never laid a hand upon me. It just- that is something that isn’t to be done. It’s absolutely indecent, and-” He fumbled to a stop, obviously still irate, albeit in his controlled fashion, but recognizing that telling her these things did no good.

”I… am usually a bit more light-footed than this…”

“I would not know about that but, that was certainly a very graceful way to sit down.” She teased him. She had not expected him to react in such a way to being kissed. It had amused her for the most part but it troubled her somewhat. She wasn’t a person to regret anything she did and she was pretty open with her emotions, she found. Albeit, with the right people of course. She was not the type of woman to go about making out and being affectionate with every single person she met, in fact this was new territory for her. And as a good hunter she knew how to tread with care.

It was that same precaution that made her wonder if she had read the room wrong. If she had assumed that Shain enjoyed the time they spent together as much as she did and held the same feelings toward her that she was discovering she felt for him. And that was the crisis in her mind, if Shian had no feelings for her she was forcing her own onto him. It made her feel a pang of guilt and her fears were strengthened when he reacted the try same way to the last kiss she gave him. Now would be a good time to have someone she could talk to and entrust her fears to. She sighed, she would probably have to be her own counsel and that was not very reassuring. If she made him uncomfortable maybe she should just back off. She felt somewhat sad in thinking of repressing emotions that had started to surface, for that was something she had always done back in Tokyo. She did not want to live the same life she did back then. But Shian was special in her heart, she did not want him to get upset or avoid her. It was a rather complicated predicament and she was not sure what to do under circumstances such as these. She thought she was the person with problems when it came to emotions, but perhaps Shian was on a whole other level. And maybe she was just making him dislike her company. If he were her Seishi she would at least know how he felt.

The other thought she had was that perhaps since he was so used to being a soldier he had not given it a thought to examine the emotions he possessed. Considering that, there was a great chance he was not sure how to react when it came to emotions and if that was the case then she would she to walk on eggshells. Regardless, he had to put up with her looking after him, it was the least she could do after all he had come to check up on her when she woke up in the middle of the night. What kind of a person would she be if she left him there to tend to his injuries now? Besides, with that injury the least he should be doing is move around. So he would have to put up with her whether he liked it or not. He had not said anything when she sat next to him so perhaps this was an experiment for the both of them, she found it reassuring to think that maybe they would both learn something on the path they were walking now.

"And there, but for the grace of Seriyuu… For having a history so similar to my own… you seem to have had all the worst of it, while I had all the best… at least, the best that I have any business to expect, given my heritage. To treat a child that way… We have laws against that kind of thing, and there is a reason. Yes, I was treated with contempt, but never… For all that she hated me, his wife never laid a hand upon me. It just- that is something that isn’t to be done. It’s absolutely indecent, and-”

Akahana turned to look at Shian and for a moment she was surprised that he showed so much anger and concern for her sake. It was rather, endearing. She looked into his eyes for a moment ad noticed he had not drank the tea yet. She offered it to him again and thought of the best way to answer. She noticed that he had caught himself before he expressed any more of his rage. But she was not unhappy nor did she feel offended that he should speak his mind. After all, she appreciated the concern and this had happened a long time ago. “It could be said that, albeit boasting of technological advances, greater ways of life and an increase in population… I come from a time and place that does not care much for laws such as those. Were any woman or man to report a situation such as this it is likely that the authorities will not do much and the aggressor will have a greater chance to cause more harm. There are cases where this is addressed before anything terrible can happen but…” She smirked in sadness, “When you are poor you have no rights, for you have no money to pay for them.”

It was true that when she was a child she had resented her mother for trying to sole the issue by dating the first man she came across. But she did not hate her, how could she? She was alone and did not know what else to do. Personally, Akahana would have rather remained incredibly poor and once she was old enough help her mother, rather than stand the abuse she and her mother did, her mother suffering the worst of it as it cost her… her life. “That said, I was unlucky still for after escaping the darkness I ended up falling back in. I could never blame myself, however, what would a poor and lonely child know of the world? I certainly had no manual on who to trust and who not to. I thought I finally found a family when in truth I was a weapon of destruction, fear and suffering on the making.”

She looked at her hands for a moment and closed her fists in an attempt to stop thinking of all the innocent lives she took. She closed her eyes for a brief moment before looking back at the burning flames. If only she could have taken him out years ago, but no one could. He was everyone’s nightmare. “No matter how I appreciate this second chance at a life, I feel… Undeserving, I know I was a helpless child back then but, that is no excuse for the things I have done.”

Time passed as they discussed things of a rather dark nature and yet she felt comfort in revealing her past to someone. She felt she could trust Shian and he would not judge her for the things she did. She was lucky that she was given a second change and that she was in the company of people like Shian, Shun, Kazune, Ryou… they were all wonderful people. And that comfort made her do something she had never done in her life. She lowered her guard in the company of someone.

Feeling the gentle wind caress her cheeks and hearing the gentle flickering of the flames something in her relaxed, she also felt that as long as she was with Shian, men if she dosed into sleep, no ill could befall her. And so she slowly began to give in to the tiredness she had felt for years, the exhaustion of a life as stressful as she had led. She wanted to sleep, she wanted to rest, she wanted to feel safe. She began to feel so relaxed that she did not notice she had fallen asleep and did not even have a blanket to keep herself warm. It did not take long for her body to shiver slightly as she moved slightly. She slightly mumbled in her sleep for she never had peaceful dreams, rather restless nightmares. Something strange happened while she had nightmares, though, she saw Shian approaching her and offering her his hand to take, she whispered as she kept dreaming, “Shian…”

After a moment, he accepted the tea from her, beginning to sip it quietly. Deep breathing marked how he efficiently worked to calm himself from how angry he’d allowed himself to become, and after a few moments, he made much more careful comments. “You don’t talk much about your life, before you came to us… but from what you have described, such an… advanced society, with such marvels as I cannot comprehend…” He shakes his head. “They sound very backward, if they have all of those wonders… and cannot recognize the wisdom of- no, the duty that they have to protect the vulnerable, in their society. Particularly those who are unable to help themselves. The quality of a society may be measured by how those who can do nothing for it are treated.” Her confession becomes a little more personal then, and he sighed heavily, his tone gentling significantly. “A child knows only that it is hungry, cold, lonely, or hurt. They cannot make wise choices. And if fear is what they know in childhood… that is often what they become, as adults. And who can lay blame at their feet? Shun and I knew security, duty, responsibility... and that is what we have become. If you knew danger, fear, and an idea that your value only existed so long as you followed orders…” He shrugs a little, and doesn’t finish, but the tone of the conversation shifts from there, revealing that he is not passing judgment, as she may have feared.



Instead, he sipped his tea as they talked, slowly watching the fire sink lower as the hour went on. Before too long, she is asleep, and he is reaching as far as he can out behind him to grab a handy branch and add more kindling. It is as he pokes the fire a little to stoke it up that he heard his name, softly, and turned, voice soft. “I’m here. I-” He broke off, as it became clear that she was calling out in her sleep, and after it had taken her so long to settle, he did not wish to wake her. Instead, with a soft sigh, he pulled the cloak from his back and stretched awkwardly to drape it over her, voice softening to a mere murmur. “Shhh, Akahana. I’m here.” Another shiver was enough to end an internal debate for him, and with a deeper sigh, he slowly and carefully wiggled over until he could fold an arm around her, pulling her in against his chest, for both warmth and security. “I’m… right here.” He strokes the crimson hair for a long moment, as he might have a child, and sighs again, closing his eyes. “I’ll be right here. I promise…”

Akahana was truly surprised that Shian should feel this anger on her behalf. She had never had someone contemplate her like a human being. Her mother had merely focused on the physical problems of looking after a child, it was true that she did not wish to lose the child and tried to grant her affection, but once her beloved abandoned her and she struggled in the slums all she could think of was getting money and when she was not a successful person in any little job she tried, even to the extent of considering prostitution, she had come across a man who promised to end her monetary issues and grant her a life she had never experienced before. In a moment of weakness she did not consider anything else but such needs and she gave in to him. Little did she know he was not going to do as he promised, rather he would give her a harder life, his real interest lied on Akahana. Now she suspected he had either been involved in trafficking or worse. And then her mother not only had to make use of her maternal instinct to provide for her starving child but she also had to physically protect her against a new threat and she had no family, no connections, she was afraid of running away with her daughter. She was afraid of a harsher life and such fears ensured she stayed where she was and endured the abuse. And then Zuku found her and the sick cycled ensued. He looked after her, taught her everything he knew regarding martial arts and weapon handling, her body was harshly exposed to the inclemencies of the weather and he forced her body to reel immunity to some poisons.

Most would consider her lucky that she had a warm meal and a roof over her head eery night from that moment forth, but it came at a terrible price, she would sacrifice everything to turn into the tool Zuku had been looking for all those years. She had seen how other persons behaved in a more ‘normal’ environment and had learned about the emotions and relationships others had but she had never taken care to practice what she saw for she knew she was in a cage there was no running away from. Sure, there had been others like her, but Zuku treated her differently than the rest, the harshest tasks were appointed to her, she was not allowed to be in touch with the other assassins, she was denied a partner even. He did ‘not’ want her close to other people. And he was a truly fearsome person, and this constant dread followed her up to this day. The moment she found the book and entered this world it produced a change in her, little by little she felt closer to others, she had the freedom to interact with people, to get to know them and in doing so she discovered a series of emotions that she did not know how to deal with. They frightened her some, for she had never felt these things as she grew up, and it granted her a level of awkwardness that her Seishi and the people she had met did not mind. They were strange people but, she came to realise she had developed a certain fondness for them all, and in different degrees.

“You don’t talk much about your life, before you came to us… but from what you have described, such an… advanced society, with such marvels as I cannot comprehend… They sound very backward, if they have all of those wonders… and cannot recognize the wisdom of- no, the duty that they have to protect the vulnerable, in their society. Particularly those who are unable to help themselves. The quality of a society may be measured by how those who can do nothing for it are treated.”

Akahana saw the anger in his eyes, like burning stars, and she knew it was not directed at her but it made her realise that, in battle, his enemy should be very afraid for he hid a fierceness she had never seen any anyone but herself. She was slightly surprised at such thoughts, as of late she had noticed how her interactions with Shian seemed to make them closer. It was a strange feeling, for the most part she was curious os to how far that connection would go, what they would experience together and their conversations only fuelled that thought alongside that warmth feeling on her chest and yet a tiny percentage of fear was perceived for she had no social experience, she had never been allowed to develop emotionally and she also was not sure about how he felt regarding all of this so there could be a chance he was simply being kind to her, and that was enough to bring her back form her reveries. What he said was true, she did not talk about herself or her life partly because she did not know how and partly because she hated her life. And yet she had no negative emotions when she thought of her mother, she too had been a victim. “Shian…” She looked into his eyes for a moment, her scarlet eyes alit with a renewed fire, “I have never spoken of my life to anyone… You are the first.” She hoped that with that she could convey how much she had come to trust him as a hand moved hesitantly to take his and squeeze it gently for a moment, “It is true that I had little to no experience connecting with other but…” She looked deeply into his eyes and moved her hand away not wanting to alarm him, “I feel drawn to you and our experiences together have given me reason to trust you men though my life has been nothing to brag about.” Taking lives was not something she liked talking about. Although she never expected to be so honest, some would say bold, with Shian. She looked back at the fire with a slight blush hoping he had not thought her pathetic for speaking these thoughts, “It is as you say, what use is there in marvel, technological discoveries and progress if no care is given to the most vulnerable, to the people who will become the foundation of tomorrow? And yet, much injustice ensues due to the corruption sown from within, no nation is free from this and few persons with comfortable lives thing much of it. Power and money have become an illness that spreads through the land.”

“A child knows only that it is hungry, cold, lonely, or hurt. They cannot make wise choices. And if fear is what they know in childhood… that is often what they become, as adults. And who can lay blame at their feet? Shun and I knew security, duty, responsibility... and that is what we have become. If you knew danger, fear, and an idea that your value only existed so long as you followed orders…”

Akahana was even more surprised by Shian’s reaction, she figured that most persons would condemn her way of life and cast her away from civilisation, away from any help. And yet, he seemed genuinely concerned about her past and his voice became gentler. She turned to look back at him, he was a reasonable man and could see the cause and effect of her life. Had she been approached by Zuku when she was older, having lived a happier life, she would have denied him the weapon she now was… Now though, despite everything she did and went through she now had the option to choose which path to follow and she did not think it twice, “that may be so but, that child now has the option and wisdom to choose for herself, I will not be making the same mistake, not anymore. And may this new life grant me the atonement I need for my past so I can move on and leave it all behind.” That said she would not claim to forger, for trauma could never be forgotten, but she would get stronger and with time and help, she would overcome it. And the fact that Shian had not judged her, as the first person who learns of her past, it was such a wonderful feeling it felt as if the ghosts of her victims were finally at peace and were willing to grant her forgiveness. It would take more than that to be forgiven for such crimes though, but she would take it one step at a time. She smiled genuinely at Shian, “Thank you.” She meant it, from the bottom of her heart, Shian had done more for her than anyone she had her met before.

As soon as she fell asleep she could not stop her dreams form becoming nightmares as they usually did. As she shivered due to the cold she was transported to that one instance where, wearing little to no clothing, she was forced by Zuku to stand outside in the middle of winter, there was a mild snowstorm and he had chained her feet so she could not scape to safety. She had been a young child still back then, and though part of her wanted to give up and just allow the cold to take her, the other part of her did not want this to be her end. She wanted to be free form Zuku and perhaps one day find atonement for the things he was forcing her do. It had been an incredibly cold night, and her feet were the first to give signs of the pain of frost. She cried for a while and called for help, but none came. She finally decided that no one would come, no one cared. She was her own support and she promised herself that day that she would escape Zuku, one day she would be free. She then began to do sit-ups and pushups, she would also do sprints right where she was and moved as much as possible taking the chains on her feet into account. She ensured to hold some ice on her hands as she did all this and drink the melted ice once it was liquid and warm enough. It had taken everything in her to shrive that night. But her spirit screamed louder than ever, it was a battle cry and she knew that one day she would have to face her enemy, but until then, she would prepare, she would plan, she would not draw any attention to herself.

“I’m here. I-”

For a moment she stopped what she was doing upon hearing a gentle voice. She gasped silently and began to feel warmth in her heart for some reason. She had assumed she was all alone so where did this reassuring once come from? She waited for a moment, and yet did not realise that at times she called out the person’s name, Shian. In her dream she was creaming his name, calling out to him, but in her sleeping form she was whispering his name. In an attempt to connect with the owner fo the voice, the first person to ever make her feel… safe.

“Shhh, Akahana. I’m here… I’m… right here”

The reassuring voice seemed to answer at her calling for him and the warmth in her heart spread across her body. She felt tears of happiness and for a moment she looked at the sky as it kept on snowing, she was not alone, she had to survive this. She had to win this fight and find the owner of the voice that answered at her time of need. She whispered happily, “Shian… thank you.” Her fiery eyes sparkled with life like near before. But then her happiness was short-lived, Zuku came out the moment he noticed a change in her, he raised an eyebrow and said, “What are you doing? Stop calling for help we are in the middle of nowhere… And I thought I told you not to fraternise with others…” Akahana felt fear take hold of her as she answered, “I have done everything you asked.” Zuku then pulled at her hair harshly making her wince in pain, “Then… explain… who is this ‘Shian’?” She trembled knowing she would be punished, he had heard her and she nearly cursed under her breath.

“I’ll be right here. I promise…”

His words made her feel empowered if for a moment and she smirked, “As if I’ll her tell you!” Zuku slapped her face harshly causing her body to turn and her to slip on the ice and fall down. Her fringe covered her eyes but she cleaned the blood form her nose and smirked, “You may be more powerful than me right now, of course you would, I’m still quite young…” She slowly stood up, “But I’m no longer your tool, I won’t do as you say anymore and there will come a day where I will defeat you with my own two hands.” The wind shook her hair and her eyes scarlet eyes sparkled with great fierceness but Zuku laughed, “When I find you… I will kill this ‘Shian’ and destroy you myself…” He drew a blade and just as he was about to stab her…

Her eyes opened widely but she did not move. Usually, whenever she woke up, she would be startled, the nightmares would feel so real and torment her in such a way that whenever she woke up she seldom fell back to sleep. It had created a habit if not sleeping as long as her body would need to. But she had little choice on the matter, it all came down to the way of life she led. And it wasn’t the best. This time, however, she had woken up gently, her body had not stirred for she felt warm and safe and… very comfortable. As soon as the remnants of her dream evaporated she realised that Shian had covered her body with his cloak and closing her eyes for a moment she took in his scent and found great comfort in it. She felt his arms around her and her head rested on his chest. She blushed deeply, particularly because she found that she truly enjoyed the feeling of his arms around her. She enjoyed it so much that she did not wish to move an inch in fear of him waking up and pushing her away. She smiled softly and her eyes sparkled affectionately, had he heard her call out to him?

She slightly looked up at his sleeping face and smiled, she gently moved a lock of dark hair from his face and very gently kissed his cheek whispering, “Thank you, Shian.” She placed her head back on his chest and mood her arm around his waist in order to return the warm embrace. Smiling softly her lids closed her so softly and she found herself drifting into sleep, and for the first time in her life, no unpleasant nightmares took hold of her, not so long as his arms granted her security and comfort.